Knowing Who You Really Are

Knowing Who You Really AreWho do you think you are? No, really, this is not meant to be sarcastic, it’s an honest question. Do you take the time to be on intimate terms with yourself, or do you just go through your days really not questioning why you do the things you do or think the things you think? If this is the case you might be surprised to learn that those thoughts and feelings are not you at all. They are actions that take place inside of you – and certainly make up a part of your working system, but they are not who you really are.

It’s very important to get to know yourself deeply, past those thoughts and feelings if you hope to create the best life possible for yourself. When you stop to think about it, your best thoughts got you to where you are right now. To make lasting changes and improvements you need to break through those thoughts and learn something more. Your real self will help you do that, not more thoughts coming from your all ready overloaded mind.

It’s not selfish to spend time learning about yourself, so indulge in this past time. According to the numbers of people who take the tests here at Inspir3, myself included, many of us love to learn about ourselves, and that’s a wonderful thing. There are all kinds of tools, tests and assessments to take to really help you pry the lid off of who you are. I recommend you pursue some of them because they give you some great insight to reflect on. However, this exploration also needs to be combined with some other work because true self-intimacy is an inside job.

What Not to Do!

The biggest mistake you can make is to try to get to know yourself by paying attention to your thought and feelings. This is because many of your thoughts are lies that have been told to you, by yourself and others throughout the years. Feelings are the weather inside of you. Nothing more than clouds that pass from sunny to dark, sometimes several times throughout the day depending on what is going on. You need to go deeper than you.

How to Start Knowing Who You Really Are

The real you is the watcher. The part of you that is completely authentic at all times, that listens to the thoughts going on in your head, feels the feelings, and makes the best choices about how to respond to them. Notice I said respond and not react and there is a big difference in that. Response takes consideration, reactions are typically done first with thought being applied later and have a higher risk of being something you will later regret.

Some people call the watcher their “higher self”, what you call it is semantics, it’s more important to get deeply acquainted with this deep part of yourself. It is the part of you that is evident when your mind is quiet, and when you realize something else is listening to the action inside your mind, that is not the same thing that is making the action. Just think a few thoughts on purpose to see if you can tell the difference. The part that isn’t thinking the part on purpose – that is the real you.

When you begin to live your life as who you really are, you will notice there is a space between your thoughts and feelings. In this space you have an increased opportunity to make choices that will be more productive and less reactive. You will be able to remain calmer and be much more effective going about your daily tasks toward whatever goals you have. Joy will become more joyful and sad feelings will be easier to deal with. Overall, life is better and comes to vibrant living color in every way.

How you get to know the Watcher, or whatever you want to call that real you is by becoming still, on the inside. This doesn’t mean boring, you still want to fully experience your feelings, but you do it more in a present way, not in a drama filled rush of stress. The real you is always, always, always in this present moment. It is never in the past or future.

The best tools for increasing your sense of your real self is by mindfulness, meditating or getting lost in activities that immerse your attention so fully that you realize your mind becomes very quiet and time just seems to slip away. Yoga is an excellent practice, or simply walking while looking at what is around you, feeling the air on your body, listening to what you can hear and otherwise fully experiencing the right here and right now.

As you become more connected to the real you and start operating in the world from that point, your life is going to change. I hope you are up for the adventures!

4 thoughts on “Knowing Who You Really Are

  1. Hey Tracy – great post! I’ve been using these techniques for a while. I’ve also been examining long held feelings about things to determine if I really feel a certain way or have I just been taught I’m supposed to feel a certain way. I think there are so many gender-specific attitudes programmed into us from birth and many should be re-evaluated.

    • Hi Stephanie,

      Thanks! I really like your point about exploring if you really feel that way or just believe you “should” feel that way. That’s a really important piece in getting into your authentic feelings and helping to de-program from societal perceptions on what you should be, feel, do. I really appreciate your sharing!

  2. This is a really good post! Every day we get pulled in so many different directions by work and friendships that it does become hard to know who we really are rather than what we are thought of bu others or wanted to be made into by friends and co-workers.

    • Thanks E! I always enjoy hearing from you. Yes, these days and times call on us to wear many hats and it can get confusing who we are underneath all of them. Taking time for meditation and other self-connection practices is so important to stay anchored and grounded.

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